I'm noticing the good life...

Well this has been an amazing time... the reason I haven't posted is because, honestly, my life has gotten so much richer and more interesting since I left Facebook. Coincidence? Maybe... but the day I deactivated the account I got a call from a great friend in Germany and a surprise visit from folks who I haven't seen in years who happened to be passing through the area where I live... the universe was saying "look into the real world for real people and they are there..." ... at least that's my interpretation of it.

so many weird and wonderful things have been going on lately and they all involve people and connection and I am really enjoying it...

I have a confession though - I did log in today because I needed to send someone a message and didn't have their email address. In doing this, I was briefly drawn into reading this that and the other thing, but soon deactivated after hearing back from her. Mission accomplished - moving on.

Another thing I'm noticing is how much Facebook had become part of my daily routine. Kind of like smoking... wake up, look at facebook. Eat... look at facebook afterwards... do anything... look at facebook afterwards for a break... I do miss our little community trading post, and am tempted to go back just for that, but I will resist for now.

I am enjoying the people and the lack of computer time... and the things that I am doing instead (swimming in the sea... walking the dog with my kiddo... doing cryptic crosswords... meeting up with friends...talking to friends) ...

Life is good (well, it always was - I'm just noticing it a bit more now)

It's been an interesting 12 hours. People's reaction to my leaving consists of "likes" where people are kinda saying "good on ya!" and other actually write their support of the idea, others worry that I will lose touch with them, others will miss my posts. All in all, thank you for the kindness and I am so glad to see that my posts are helpful to others!

But today is the day - I go to Facebook to try and cancel my account and I can't seem to figure out how to do it! I have been searching through my settings and can't seem to figure this out. They don't make it easy to leave. I go to scroll down to the bottom of my page and see the last few years of posts and get a bit nostalgic...  past adventures, past relationships, friends and relatives lovely comments, and Ayla growing up in front of my eyes. Sigh... this is harder than I thought. I start questioning whether this is necessary. Perhaps I could just ignore it for a few days...

I have tried that before and to be honest, it's like having a bar of chocolate sitting in the drawer when you are trying to give up sweets - I just know it's there and it keeps "calling me."

Ok, back to trying to figure out how to leave...
Ahhh - I figured it out! No they do not make it easy! Here's the message I receive before I confirm that I want to deactivate my account:

 

"Are you sure you want to deactivate your account?"

 

"Deactivating your account will disable your profile and remove your name and picture from most things you've shared on Facebook. Some information may still be visible to others, such as your name in their friends list and messages you sent."

 

"Your 394 friends will no longer be able to keep in touch with you." and here's the kicker, photos of various friends are posted along with the message beside each photo, "____ will miss you."

Nice touch... and indeed, I realize that I will miss everyone and miss having a wee window into everyone's lives - especially those of you who live far away. However, I'm going on a Facebook holiday for a couple of months to realign things in my non-virtual life and this is the perfect time to do so. 

Take care everyone and see you later!

Ta ta for now!

Love,

Melissa

 

p.s. when I tic the reason for leaving Facebook, an automated answer to "solve" my problem pops up... and right after deactivating my account, Facebook sends and email with three different links to reactivate my account. Geez... and apparently, through something called Facebook Connect, accounts have been created on Soundcloud by me (though I was completely unaware of this)!... and that is one way to connect to my information... this is a bit disconcerting...

Well, here I go...

After thinking about this for a few days... months... well to be honest, over one year, I am taking a break from facebook. At least that's what my latest status update claims - I figured I'd give people a small warning and perhaps it was one last attempt at connection with the world outside of my visual sphere. The process of actually pressing the "good-bye" button feels really difficult. After posting that I was leaving, within seconds, I've had responses which just draw me back in. I will miss that instant feedback that somehow is a validation that I exist and people are listening.

The reason I am doing this is that I have recently finished one leg of a journey of study which is heading towards a PhD in Psychology and a postgraduate diploma in Clinical Psychology. I spent a great deal of my study time procrastinating on Facebook. A GREAT DEAL OF TIME. That didn't bother me so much because I justified it since I did actually get work done. However, now that I have finished my studies for the summer, and have a lot more spare time... I notice the space... which I fill with Facebook. Endless wandering through posts, videos, photos... looking for something... looking for connection, and often feeling far sadder and less fulfilled then when I began. Yet I can't seem to stop...

Hi, my name is Melissa and I am a Facebook addict.

So I decided this had to change. I want to see what life is like for me without Facebook and where I am not relying on cyberspace to fill my hours and to be my virtual friend, partner and life experience. I am taking the leap.

I know I will unfortunately not be as aware of what is going on in everyone's life... but I think it's time I do this. To know that I can.

I will plot my journey on this blog...
Kind of like a long winded status update...